Invincible
by J-Chan7
Summary: Alas, it seems all I write nowadays is angst. Anyway, sort of a prequel to A Sort of Homecoming. In the future, Shiloh runs into some trouble and finds a little faith. Language is not happy.


Invincible- Lyrics by Pat Benetar and in italics. Terminator © whoever owns it.   
Story by J-Chan, bwee.   
  
In a moment it was all gone. Everything I had ever wanted was ripped from my hands. My bloodstained hands. The peace.. the love.. everything.. it was just gone in that instant. That instant the gunshots woke me from my only solace, my dreams.   
  
_This bloody road remains a mystery  
This sudden darkness fills the air_   
  
I can still remember that day. Sometimes I wonder how I ever managed to survive it. Maybe it was some greater thing that kept me going. Then again, all that is just bullshit. I guess you don't need me to tell you that I've lost all faith in anyone but myself. Don't try to lecture me on god. I don't believe in him. He didn't provide for us when my father ran off and left my mother to feed 2 children in a world he himself abandoned. He wasn't there for me when my mother was shot to death in front of my face. He hasn't shown me any of that 'everlasting love' that he's supposed to have. He just left me to my misery for those many lonely years of my life. The only consolation I thought I may have had was in Michael White.. but that just turned out to be another damned betrayal. It seems that's all my life is.. betrayal.   
I guess I've got it no worse than anyone else on this forlorn hellhole. Maybe better. Who knows? At least I wasn't left to die in the heat for days on end.. hell, at least I'm alive. I guess that's all that matters. It's all about survival out here. Kill or be killed. But I guess it's not really considered killing since they're just machines. Just metal and wires. But how the hell do they fucking know to kill all of us? One by one? What sick-minded person programmed torture into them? It just fucks with someone's mind, you know… I mean, what if we could prevent this? How many people would be saved? How many wouldn't have to suffer through the torment of living in this fucking world? If it was possible.. shit, if it was possible..   
  
_What are we waiting for?  
Won't anybody help us?_   
  
I don't know what in the hell I'm doing out here… out in the desert in the middle of the night looking for a place that probably doesn't exist. Sanctuary Gold.. if I somehow find my way there.. I can talk to Barake.. I can get something done. I can find out what the next action against the terminators is… I can help, damnit. I can get something fucking done. I can make life for others just like me a little better.. I can.. shit.. I hope I can.   
  
_What are we waiting for?  
We can't afford to be innocent_   
  
What if I'm not good enough? What if I fail? What if I can't make life better for everyone else and just get myself killed in the process? That'd be some fucking irony.   
I'm so hungry.. I don't think I've eaten in days. And my arm… shit, I don't even want to think about the pain. If it's this bad for me.. what about the rest of them? We have fucking children in this party! How in the hell am I supposed to feed them when I can't even feed myself? How am I supposed to protect them when I couldn't even save my own child? How..?   
  
_Stand up and face the enemy  
It's a do or die situation  
We will be invincible_   
  
Fuck that! I'm just messing with my own fucking head again. I've just gotta keep going. Keep on living 'til I die. Can't give up. I've got a brother out there somewhere. Gotta make sure that he can settle down and have his own kids in peace. Can't give up. Just gotta ignore the pain. Just gotta make it somehow.   
  
_This shattered dream you cannot justify  
We're gonna scream until we're satisified_   
  
Barake. He'll help us. Somehow, our savior will make everything better. At Gold, he'll give us food.. lots of food.. he'll have medical supplies. And weapons. If I can just survive up until Gold, I'll be able to make it the rest of the way.   
It's so strange.. I feel.. I feel like my going go Gold is some divine providence. But that's all bullshit, isn't it? I said that already. I don't believe in any of this crap.   
The why the hell do I feel like going to Gold is so important?   
  
_What are we running for?  
We've got the right to be angry_   
  
I don't know.. I don't know anything anymore…   
…What was that?!  
Shit! It's a raid! Gotta warn everyone! Fuck! This just had to happen now! Where's my damned gun? Is it loaded? I hope so.. fuck, I hope so..   
There's one of them! Pick up the gun, Shiloh! Pick it up! You're just going to let everyone die?! PICK UP THE GUN! FIRE! KILL IT! THINK OF WHAT THEY'VE DONE TO YOU AND FIRE!   
Keep firing! It might not be dead yet!   
  
_What are we running for?  
When there's no where we can run to anymore_   
  
It's dead. Are there anymore? No? You can't be too sure. That's what makes you a fuck-up, Shiloh. Keep looking. Stay on guard.   
They're dead.. Jeremy took out one.. I took out one..   
Only two? That's not right... they never travel in pairs...   
There's always one more...   
Always one more..   
Something behind you! Turn around, Shiloh! No! Duck!   
I've been shot.. I'm going to be shot again.. I'm going to die.. die like this.. an ambush from behind. I'm going to die..   
  
_We can't afford to be innocent  
Stand up and face the enemy  
_   
I can't die. I just... I can't... have to live.. make sure they live too.. It's my fault.. I didn't see it coming.. how could I be so stupid.. My fault..   
What's going on..? They all sound so far away... everything.. going.. black.. something's.. wrong... everything.. getting.. darker.. can't.. see.. can't.. hear..   
  
_It's a do or die situation  
We will be invincible_   
  
"..She's not waking up, Mister Isra-"  
  
"I DAMNED WELL KNOW SHE'S NOT WAKING UP!"   
"..."   
"Sorry.. I'm sorry.. but I am not letting her die here."   
"There's nothing more we can do.."   
"Well you'd better find something."   
"She's comatose..."   
"I CAN SEE THAT!"   
"Mister Israfel, there is no need to scream at me. I'm the one trying to help."   
"Shit.. I just want her to live. She's my fucking sister. I fucking care about her. What the hell else am I supposed to do? Huh? Just fucking sit here and wait? Wait for her to die? To watch my only family fade away?"   
"Mister Israfel-"   
"My name is Sumter."   
"Alright. Sumter, I'm doing all I can."   
"..There's.. nothing else? You can't do.. anything else?"   
"..I'm looking into it."   
"..Looking into it?"   
  
_And with the power of conviction  
There is no sacrifice  
It's a do or die situation  
We will be invincible_   
  
"..I'm not the final authority on what happens to your sister.."   
"THEN WHO THE FUCK IS?!"   
"..."   
"..Goddamnit.. god fucking damn it all.."   
"I'm sorry.."   
"Don't feed me that bullshit. You know what you can do."   
"And I'm trying! I am!"   
"Not hard enough, I guess.."   
"... Sumter.."   
"You just go talk to your supervisors or whatever. Leave me the fuck alone."   
"I'm sorry..."   
"Yeah, I'm so fucking sure that you are."   
"..."   
"I SAID LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!"   
The young woman sighed and shook her head, leaving the room. Sumter Israfel remained, looking at his younger sister. He was moody that day.. he had a right to be. The man was watching his younger sister die, and there was nothing that he could do about it. He couldn't save her.. and it was tearing him apart.   
Reclining back in the worn stool that he was perched on, Sumter closed his eyes and began to sing softly. He did this often, mostly in times of crisis and emotional anguish. His rich, deep voice rose and fell melodically, as went along with the song.   
  
_Won't anybody help us?  
What are we running for?  
When there's no where, no where we can run to anymore_   
  
Suddenly, a tired, weary voice joined his own. Still as beautiful and sweet, this new feminine voice matched the harmony of his own. Not stopping his song, Sumter opened his eyes, only to be greeted with the sight of his sister, her eyes open and smiling wearily at him. Tears rolled down her cheeks. Tears of happiness, perhaps. The young man reached over and wiped them from her eyes, cradling her cheek in his hand.   
The song ended, and she spoke, weakly, yet gently. "I've missed you, brother.."   
"I missed you too, Shiloh."   
"I would not have met you like that.. being it that we met by my own accord."   
"I know.."   
"Where am I?"   
"The hospital. In the tunnels."   
"I see.. I've been here.. before."   
"..I know. They told me."   
"..About the baby."   
"Yes."   
Her eyes watered again. "..I.. It wasn't my fault.."   
"I know, Shi.." He murmured, reaching across the bed and hugging her. "I know."   
  
_We can't afford to be innocent  
Stand up and face the enemy  
It's a do or die situation  
We will be invincible_   
  
She smiled at him for a moment. "I love you, brother."   
"..You can't resist, can ya?" He said, casting a grin in her direction.   
Shiloh began giggling. "No, I can't... But you always ruin the mood, don't you?"   
"It's one of my many character flaws. Forgive me."   
She laughed again.   
"...Shiloh.. you're going to get better, right?" He asked, almost apprehensively. The tone suddenly shifting again.   
"..Of course I am, Sumter."   
"..You know what they're sayin-"   
"I don't care what they're saying. You forget, I'm invincible."   
He smirked a bit, and let the word roll over his tongue as he repeated it. "Yeah Shi.. Invincible."   



End file.
